Fear.

On Friday, we took the kids to Blondie’s birthday party. It was the older girls’ very first sleepover (which I was not even remotely prepared for – they did great), but all of us went early for pizza and swimming.

Papa Bear jumped in to play lifeguard while I sat on the sidelines with Baby Bear and the camera.

It’s been a long time since we’ve been to the pool (the last time was pretty much a disaster), and I was nervous about how the kids were going to do. Tiny Dancer shocked me by being the first in the water. We kept having to call her back from the deep end because she was absolutely fearless.

Next in line was Lil Prince who was equally fearless. He tends to be timid in unfamiliar situations, so that took me by surprise.

I think Bay Bit was the only one who didn’t surprise me. She screamed like a siren for about fifteen minutes before squealing, “This is FUN!”

And fun, it was.

Cuddle Bug clung to the side and watched. The splashing, the screaming and the laughing…she seemed so jealous but still so scared. We all explained to her about her life-vest, and how she couldn’t go under the water even if she tried. But her faith just wasn’t there to except it. Even though Bay Bit kept yelling, “Come on in, I’m not melting!” Cuddle Bug was still scared.

“Honey, it’s not the water. It’s only fear,” I urged.

I don’t have any photos of what happened next. But I’ll do my best to do the story justice. I, for one, will remember it for the rest of my life.

She got out of the pool and she paced around. I had begged and coaxed for about twenty minutes, so I tried to give her some space….but I watched her out of the corner of my eye. “Fear,” that seemed to be making her angry. And the longer she paced, the madder she became.

“Cuddle Bug, it’s alright Sweetie,” I said, “Just come sit here by me.” And then, without any warning, she ran up behind me and grabbed her abandoned pool noodle. She picked it up like she was going to use it to beat the Devil, and she held it as she made a flying leap into the pool.

I stood up and screamed like a charismatic at an old-fashioned Holy Ghost meeting. “Did you see that?!?” I yelled to Papa Bear who had missed it. “She just said, ‘Take that, Devil!’ to her fear.”

She walked over and sat beside me wearing five inches of a smile. “Honey, do you want to try it again?” I said, really hoping for a picture.

“No, not today. That was enough,” she said.